Out of thought came the word

Love & Relationships: Does Online Dating Really Work? A New Book Says, Maybe

Online dating apps are here to stay, with more couples now meeting via the Internet than elsewhere — so why are so many complaining about how bad they are, and what can be done to make online dating better? A groundbreaking new book may have some answer.

By Ben Arogundade. October 20, 2020.

WE HAVE NOW REACHED the tipping point in how relationships happen — more couples meet online than in real life. Whether we like it or not, Internet dating is the new normal, and statistically speaking, traditional romance is dead.

Following the break-up of my six-year relationship, I embarked upon an eventful journey through the precarious world of online dating apps. During this time I was shocked by the behaviour of the older, divorced singles of my generation. I was stood up, ghosted, verbally abused, propositioned for sex and asked to be a surrogate father to an unborn child, amongst other things.


As a black man, I also found myself approached online by middle-aged white women in search of “something different”. Ethnic minorities generally fare worse within online dating than whites. Black women statistically rank as the least attractive amongst men, receiving fewer matches and responses, and are subject to the highest levels of online abuse.


Within the dating apps, identifying suitable matches was very difficult. The turning point for me came when I learned to be an emotional detective. By interpreting the clues and hidden messages within the words and images online daters posted in their profiles I was able to pinpoint those who were emotionally unavailable or otherwise unsuitable. My book offers a step-by-step guide that teaches Internet daters exactly how to do this, and thereby identify better matches.


But despite online dating’s popularity there are major issues the book highlights, including;

• Why you have a less than 20 per cent chance of finding love online.

• Why black women who seek love should never use ‘Tinder’.

• Why dating apps should carry a government health warning.

• Why dating apps would prefer that you don’t find love.

• Why 90 per cent of online daters may not actually want a relationship.

To find out more about these issues, and to learn how to use Internet dating apps better, get the book at Amazon.

Internet date book, My Terrifying, Shocking, Humiliating, Amazing Adventures In Online Dating


My Terrifying, Shocking, Humiliating, Amazing Adventures In Online Dating


The Telegraph

“Extraordinary and revelatory.”


Author Ben Arogundade recounts his journey as an online dater, during which time he was stood up, verbally abused, propositioned for sex and asked to be a father to an unborn child. Along the way he offers singles the secrets and best practices they need to know to boost the quality of their matches, and presents the latest strategies, research-based guidelines and innovations to take their online profiles to new levels of excellence. Get it now at Amazon, £9.99/$12.99.

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The Sexual Language Of Strangers (novel)

Four men are paid to seduce and abandon...but then one of them breaks the rules

“A clever, dark drama,” says Esquire

Eccentric millionaire Dennison Carr invents a bizarre game in which he pays a group of handpicked men to seduce women he selects at random from the streets, bars and clubs of London. The chosen women all appear to share the same desire for the thrill of no-strings sex with a stranger. One of the male seducers, a down-and-out graphic designer named Erskine, is recovering from a recent trauma that has made him averse to relationships. Things begin to unravel when he begins to develop feelings for one of the women he is paid to seduce — a commitment-phobic jazz singer called Natascha. As they both battle against their aversion to intimacy, and their expanding feelings for one another, neither is prepared for the shocking conclusion Dennison has planned.

The novel, which boasts 18 SEX SCENES, became a cult hit when first released, and was championed by Hollywood actor and ‘Matrix’ star Laurence Fishburne, who recorded an audio segment which has never been released. Get the book now at Amazon, £8.99/$11.99, or read a sample.

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